11 reasons why you should boycott #TweetupSL 5

Twitter is nice. Some say nicer than Facebook or even that other social network Google+. It’s more fun than LinkedIn cause people are serious on that and mostly used for job hunting and to show a good face to other work colleagues and potential job hunters. So when Twitter users (Tweeps) want to get out of being visible online and meet the unknown strangers that they interact on Twitter, a Tweetup happens. It’s actually more of a mass scale event since known Tweeps would anyway meet up at least during the weekend and go bowling or watch a film or go to drink a Ginger beer together. So in Sri Lanka, more or less in a place called Colombo, such a ‘mass scale’ Tweetup happened for the first time in 2010. It was called TweetupSL (the name was actually given by @keheliya). That was at the time, a huge milestone to see a massive 80+ tweeps in one location. A writeup of it is on the interne if anyway wanted to know the details.

Now we are coming to the end of 2014, and lot of things have changed in the Twittersphere. Well sort of. Twitter is still a less used social network. Facebook dominates in Sri Lanka with over 2.6 million total users (not all active, includes fake accounts). Twitter users are much less, under 213,000 registrations in total (not all active, includes fake accounts) in Sri Lanka.

The TweetupSL event had been held annually and on 20th December 2014 at Orion City, the 5th installment of it will happen. So why should you care? You as a twitter user, actually shouldn’t be to be honest. Yep, and I will give you my reasons too.

1. @gayanmw is not coming. The once dominating figure in the Twitter world in Sri Lanka, is no longer giving priority to tweeps and rather focusing on his life so that he will not need to rant about things when he could actually do something about it with the time he has now, even get to spend more time talking and chatting to his girl/fiancee/wife. So when he dumps us tweeps to do such, we should not only boycott TweetupSL but Twitter too!!

2. @gihangamos is coming. What is worse than GayanMW not coming is that, instead of a gentlemen like him, we have a guy who is an attention seeker. Not only is he one, he also is a professional ‘thada’ racist. I mean, seriously, why bother reading the rest of the points, these 2 should be enough for you to boycott TweetupSL 5. [UPDATE: Almost forgot, honest, amathaka una, what’s worse than @gihangamos coming is that he isn’t even bringing the #TweetupSLbook which he promised to have ready for last TweetupSL! It’s been over 1 year now dude! Where is the damn book!?? Talk about being a troll ey!]

3. No Jaqueline’s Appa. Instead of munching on her 2 big hoppers, you only get to eat some noodles which are not even Halal certified most likely!

4. More than 1500 registrations. Tweeps are generally introverts and even the first TweetupSL was considered by many as ‘oh my gowd, there are too many tweeps in one place’. So now imagine yourself surrounded by at least 750 of them (in an open area though, but still, what if that dude or dudez that makes fun of you approaches you, you will have run to also in the open area where everyone will see, not good for introverts, staying at home, you must).

5. The Tshirt design. All these years, a certain telecom network decided how the tshirt design was to be done. They never allowed the tweeps to do the work for them. But hell no, a change of telecom network this time and all hell breaks out. So much so is their laziness, that they even outsourced the tshirt design for the tweeps to do! How dare they let us decide! Nevertheless 30+ tweeps did consider and did it on a pro bono basis. So why in the world should tweeps go to an event where the Principal sponsor do such ridicilous things, thus hurting the very sentiments of the tweeps.

6. A Western embassy. Not many noticed, but it seems an ‘Adirajjawadi kumanthrana’ is in the works. I can’t say more, psst… check the ‘Gift Sponsors’ for a clue.

7. Not for selected elite tweeps. Tweeps have been so used to being invited for events by different brands, that going for this event, which is more less open for all (at least 1 month twitter account is the only barrier! I mean, come on, that’s like an insult to some who have been here for like 5 months on twitter and tweeted like 10,000+ tweets!). It does seem a bit cheap when all are welcome, what happens to our elite status? So think about it tweeps, think twice before showing your face and making yourself look cheap.

8. Gembo sighting. With Presidential elections happening next month (Jan 2015), if tweeps attend a whole day event like this, think of all the gossip of Politicians jumping from one side to another that you would miss! Who will inform tweeps if everyone decides to come and have fun with rodeo bulls, mini xxx, *******, ***** and shooting activities etc..?? Why come and spend time in the sun when you could nicely be at home chilling surfing on some unu unu gossip.

9. The awards. 13 voting categories. 13, I mean, out of all the numbers, they have 13, talk about luck eh? With many more new tweeps now actively on twitter, you realise that the person who is nominated is not even in your circle of tweeps.. and the computer jilmart of some to win, I mean come on, we know its not a serious award, but still, why do people do such just to get free stuff. It’s like some tweeps coming for TweetupSL just for the tshirt..oh wait…

10. Donate this, donate that. We spent our valuable money on buying books and gadgets not to go and end up donating to others. Fine, so the book is now read and we won’t be touching that again, but come on, it looks nice on the bookshelf and people who come and visit our home will see all these books and would depinitely know that we read books, how else would they know right? And don’t even get me started on them asking for our old devices. Yes, it does not work and we will never use them ever again, but who in Sri Lanka donates gadgets! Don’t let them change our minds people, ahuwenna epa owata! Keep the old books, keep the old devices, don’t come to TweetupSL 5.

11. English only site. Anemanda mehemath minissu! The site is only in English! We tweeps have always canvassed for a Trilingual society, where even the toilet paper should be in all 3 languages. But, ballannako these people, http://tweetupsl.org is only in English. The nerve of some people I tell you. Anush, Sanjana, mey obey awadanaya pinisai!

I am done with the ranting for kind consideration of the awesome tweeps in Sri Lanka. Unfortunately, I would be forced to attend it since I am somewhat (kiyannath lajjai) part of the organising committee. But you don’t ok, stay at home, or go to Good Market or any of the other Gota parks.

Header image – courtesy @nHiRanZ


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